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- 12-JAN-2025 | Excerpt from Peter Gatley’s “98.4% Fat Free” Ad
12-JAN-2025 | Excerpt from Peter Gatley’s “98.4% Fat Free” Ad
Dan Bogachek
January 12, 2025
Nothing crazy flashy here — the word that comes to mind is “gentle.”
98.4% FAT FREE.
NOT HER,
THE MILK.
Nature decrees that all of us carry some fat.
For those of us carrying a little too much, however, help is on hand in the shape of a bottle. Semi-Skimmed milk is only 1.6% fat.
With less than half the fat of whole milk, it’s one way to cut down on the fat in your diet.
Yet a pint of Semi-Skimmed still contains enough calcium for the average adult’s daily needs.
And it delivers other minerals and a veritable alphabet of vitamins. 🏁
Hook → intentional misdirection to subvert expectations.
Momentum conservation words: “Yet” and “and.”
“For those of us carrying a little too much” → a negative gets framed in “we” instead of “you” for a gentler approach.
You glance at your watch.
It’s 6:28. You’ve been at it since 3.
Crap. Your hot date is at 7. Running late. Sink shower it is.
Nowhere close to done editing…
“…at least all the ideas are laid out, so there’s that. Did I miss anything? I don’t think so? Ok, but how do I make it flow? I need to get the final draft to Stacey for design asap, team cutoff is at noon Thursday…”
You’ve spent dinner completely distracted. Your date just took off. You go home exhausted, plod to your desk, and flip open the laptop.
Or… what if:
5:41 — you’re out of the shower and lip-syncing.
6:17 — dressed to the nines and zenned out.
7:03 — the sunset glints off your aviators as you smile hello.
8:36 — it actually feels like you’re hitting it off. Not just hot, funny to boot.
Next morning, 9:27 — final draft ready in your inbox.
10:31 — Stacey messages back, “thanks, looks good!”
The difference?
Copygloss handled it. Before you left for the date, actually.
For help with editing, email Dan:
[email protected].
